Harry and Co in: RENT
by sweethomegirl
Summary: Harry and Co have an all out Musical Bash! Rated PG for mild language. I accept all reviews, although this is my first fanfic, so be gentle please!!!


Harry Potter and Co in: RENT  
  
I wrote this while I was in a fairly Christmas-y mood. It is a musical and It does have Christmas themes, but it's not purely Christmas, if you have seen or heard the play you will understand this better! It is rated PG for mild language. Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters, they belong to JKR. I also do not own Rent or the storyline or the characters. The idea is all mine though!!!  
  
Cast:  
  
Five Homeless People:  
  
Dobby  
  
Winky  
  
Oliver  
  
Neville  
  
Pansy  
  
Broom-washer:  
  
Percy (out of a job after the incident at the end of book four)  
  
Vendor 1:  
  
Fred  
  
Vendor 2:  
  
Hagrid  
  
  
  
  
  
CHRISTMAS BELLS (Hogsmede) Five Homeless People: Christmas bells are ringing! Christmas bells are ringing! Christmas bells are singing on Broomsticks - at Hogwarts!  
  
Broom-washer: Honest living, honest living Honest living, honest living Honest living, honest living  
  
All five Homeless: Can't you spare a knut or two? Here but for the grace of Harry Potter go you! Have you seen Harry? I've seen Harry!  
  
Draco: Harry ain't in my vocabulary!  
  
Homeless: No sleigh bells, No Santa Claus, No yule ball, No tinsel, No holly, No hearth,  
  
Draco: No Harry! (cause I'm going home tonight!)  
  
Homeless: (in the background) Harry cause he's goin' home tonight!  
  
Homeless: No room at Diagon Alley! -- oh no (A few flakes of snow begin to descend.) And it's beginning to snow !(Hogsmede suddenly explodes with life. The scene is Hogsmede on Christmas Eve -- an open-air bazaar of color, noise, and movement.)  
  
Vendors: Cats, bats, rats, shoes! Dress robes, potpourri! Firebolts, Lightning zolts!  
  
Vendor #1: No one's flying Feel like crying  
  
Homeless: No room at Diagon Alley, oh no And it's beginning to snow  
  
Switch Scene to Hermione and Ron in front of Honeydukes  
  
Vendor #2: (showing various things to Hermione and Ron) How about a rat -- In perfect shape who really is an evil man called Wormtail! I got a stone given up by Nicolas Flammel who was old and then quickly died!  
  
Hermione: You don't have to do this! (a hiss from Crookshanks in the background)  
  
Ron: Hush your cat, he's vicious  
  
Hermione: Crookshanks does not deserve such anger!  
  
Ron: Give--that cat to me! All he does is hiss!! Sorry (as he sees Hermione glaring at him), I'll find a way to show How much you've touched me so!  
  
Hermione: Wait--what's on the floor? Let's see some more... No--no--no... Kiss me -- it's beginning to snow (Ron has disappeared)  
  
Scene changes to Harry and Ron  
  
Ron:... She said, "Would you clean my broomstick?" And she put on a pout And she wanted you To take her flying tonight? Right! She got you out!  
  
Harry: She was more than a babe, But I pushed her away It was bad -- I got mad And I had to get her out of my sight  
  
Ron: Wait, wait, wait -- you said she was sweet?  
  
Harry: Let's go drink -- I'll just get drunk It's the best thing left when an evil lord is after you!  
  
Ginny enters looking for Seamus Finnigan  
  
Harry: There -- that's her  
  
Ron: Pansy?  
  
Harry: Ginny!  
  
Ron: Ack!!!! Bloody hell! My sister...(goes off on a rant)  
  
Harry: (sensing Ron's anger) I should go  
  
Ron: (seeing Hermione glare at him..... he quickly changes the subject) Hey -- it's beginning to snow!  
  
Ron and Hermione go off with drinks  
  
Mad-eye Moody and Lupin barge in, in Auror gear  
  
Aurors: I'm dreaming of an troll-less Christmas!! (Aurors exit.)  
  
Ginny and Homeless: Follow Seamus! -- follow Seamus! With his pockets full of every flavoured beans! Follow Seamus-- follow Seamus! Help me out, buddy If you can! Got any root beer?  
  
Seamus: Get away from me!!!!!!  
  
Ginny and Homeless: Got any toenail?  
  
Seamus: No way!  
  
Ginny and Homeless: Got any ear wax? Any chocolate? Any pumpkin? Any booger wooger, boy? Any snow?  
  
Harry Suddenly pulls Ginny aside  
  
Harry: Hey  
  
Ginny: Hey  
  
Harry: I just want to say I'm sorry for the way --  
  
Ginny: Forget it  
  
Harry: I threw up! Can I make it up to you?  
  
Ginny: How?  
  
Harry: Christmas party?  
  
Ginny: That'll do  
  
Draco: Hey lover boy -- cutie pie! You steal my girlfriend -- you die  
  
Harry: You didn't miss her -- you never will! Go back to drinking your filthy swill!!  
  
Homeless: I'm willin' I'm illin' I gotta get my broomstick off. Gotta run, gotta ride, Gotta eat, gotta fly -- gotta go!  
  
Seamus: And it's beginning to snow!  
  
George Weasly enters talking on a Muggle invention (the cell phone)  
  
George: Wish me luck, Angelina The quidditch game is on!  
  
Vendor #2: Dragons! Unicorns! Wart potions and more!!!!!  
  
Homeless:(still after Seamus for EFB's) Got any citrus man? Got any dung man? Got any coffee man? Got any popcorn? Got any mex?  
  
Seamus: NO!!!!!!!  
  
Broom-washer: Honest living --  
  
Harry: Hermione, this is Ginny--  
  
Hermione/Ginny: Hi  
  
Harry: She'll be dancing -- (with us)  
  
Vendor #1: Here's a new arrival  
  
Seamus: (to Crabbe) That is an ounce of beans  
  
Vendors: Bats, cats, rats  
  
Vendor #2 suddenly rips off Georges coat and tries to sell it to Dean Thomas  
  
George: That's my coat!  
  
Vendor #2: We give discounts!  
  
Ron: (getting a bit tipsy from butter beer) I think we've met (said to George)  
  
Hermione: Let's get you some water  
  
Ron: That's a sham!  
  
Ginny: That's what he said....  
  
Seamus: I said it's a gram!  
  
Ron: But she's a thief!(looking at a tiny mouse, he's still somewhat tipsy)  
  
Hermione: (now getting tipsy herself) But she brought us together!  
  
George: (on his cell phone)Which players coming?  
  
Ron: I'll take the feather  
  
George: Krum? -- Damn!  
  
(The following is sung simultaneously.)  
  
Homeless and Vendors: Christmas bells are swinging, Christmas bells are ringing Christmas bells are singing In my dreams -- next year! Once you fly you can go to the Yule ball in Hogwarts School! You'll feel cheery I'll feel cheery Tho' I don't really know that theory! No Wormtail! No Padfoot too! No Prongs! No Moony! Voldie should be roasting on an open fire' Voldie roasting on an open fire! No room at Diagon Alley, oh no  
  
Aurors: I'm dreaming of a white Christmas Just like the ones I used to know. Jingle bells -- Azkaban cells Fa la la la -- fa la la la! You have the right to remain Silent night holy night Fall on your knees oh night divine. I'll suck out your soul Fa la la la la Fa la la la la  
  
Homeless:(still looking for more every flavour beans) Got any cherry man? Got any dirt man? Got any beans man? Got any worm? -- lemon? I'm chillin' -- I'm willin' Gotta get my broomstick off! Gin-E help me! Follow Seamus -- follow Seamus! Follow Seamus! Booger wooger -- wooger booger! Seamus! Follow Seamus -- follow Seamus! Any corn any meat any booger wooger, boy? Any snow, any bone, any booger wooger, boy? Got any potato man, got any cheese man Got any pb and j -- any bread-- any booger wooger?  
  
Seamus: OKAY!!! OKAY!!!!  
  
Homeless:(price for beans) Twenty knuts!  
  
Seamus: Thirty!  
  
Homeless: Twenty-five  
  
Seamus: Twenty-seven  
  
Homeless: Twenty six!  
  
Seamus: No way Twenty-eight!  
  
Homeless: Twenty-seven!  
  
Seamus: Sold!!!  
  
Harry and Ron: Let's Go To The school -- Padma's performing  
  
Ginny: Who's Padma?  
  
Harry: His ex  
  
Ron: But I am so over her!  
  
Harry: (to Ginny) Let's not hold hands yet, okay?  
  
Ginny: Is that a warning?  
  
Ron/Ginny/Harry: He/You/I Just Need(s) To take it slow!  
  
Harry: I should tell you I should tell you I should tell you I should tell you I should tell you I ...  
  
All: And it's beginning to! And it's beginning to! And it's beginning to ---  
  
All of the street lights go out, a blinding light comes on up at the Shrieking Shack revealing Padma. Everyone looks up at her.  
  
Padma: Parvati, which way to the stage?  
  
All: Snow!!!  
  
The end! I hope you liked that part!!!:) 


End file.
